America, the Beautiful

So it all started with this on Super Bowl Sunday:

America, the Beautiful.  Showing what America is made of.  Different sexes.  Different races.  Different ethnicities.  Different languages.  A melting pot of uniqueness.  That's what makes America what it is today.  Then I see this first thing the next morning:

Wow.  Seriously?!?!  The hateful comments, which I chose not to put on here, were ridiculous.  I cannot believe there are so many people out there that are so ignorant.  What made me even sadder is that I have a "friend" on my Facebook that actually "liked" this comment.  It makes me sick to my stomach.

If people don't like the way America is today, they are more than welcome to leave.  Coca-Cola has always been about bringing people together "in perfect harmony."  Their message is simple: we are all beautiful, no matter our color, sex, or sexual orientation.  I want this to be the message my girls grow up with.

It bothers me that I have to explain this to my girls.  Yes, I know that times are changing, and I'm loving it.  I like explaining it to my girls, but it still bothers me.  Cadyn is noticing things more and more these days.  There were times when she looked at an Olympian (the American speed skater J.R. Celski), she said that it "looks like he should be on the China team." Teachable moment.  I explained to her, first off, that not all Asians are Chinese.  He is half Polish and half Filipino.  I explain to her, remind her, that she is half white and half Puerto Rican and Cuban.  She is Hispanic.  I know she's young, but I have got to clear this up quickly.  Just like students at my school (my daughter was one of these, but not anymore) that call all the bilingual students "Spanish" kids.  I have explained to these students that it would be more accurate to call them Mexican, as most of them are of Mexican descent, but the term "Hispanic" is more PC.  These are innocent kids.  I have to teach them.  I feel it's my job as an educator to educate.

But the people posting on the above post are NOT kids.  They are adults.  They are parents.  They are Americans.  But they don't like the way America is portrayed or how "their" song is sung.  "It is meant to be sung in English." "English is America's language." There are 1244 comments on the above thread and only a handful (like mine) are defending Coca-Cola.  I guess that is just who follows a guy as ignorant as Todd Starnes.  Heck, the author of "America, the Beautiful," Katherine Lee Bates, was a lesbian.  They are forwarding this ugliness to the public and I, as a parent, cannot allow it to go on without saying or writing something.

I teach my girls all the time that it's okay that men fall in love with men and women fall in love with women.  It doesn't make them any different than their mom falling in love with their dad.  They deserve to be as happy as we are.  We watch Ellen and the girls think nothing of the fact that Ellen and Portia are married.  We watch Modern Family and my girls love Cam and Mitchell.  And they haven't even mentioned that Lilly is Vietnamese.  And they might not know it (though they kind of do), their parents are the same as Jay and Gloria (I am a less sexy with no accent Gloria)...white and Hispanic.  I know that Cadyn "forgets" that she is Hispanic, and this is not okay by me.  I dropped the ball by not teaching her Spanish, but I need to.  I need to make my girls proud to be Hispanic.  I feel like I have to take them to more cultural events, but not limited to Hispanic events.  I want them to experience different ethnicities and cultures and lifestyles.  When I tell them that they know people who are gay, they are surprised.  They can't put their finger on who it is and that makes me happy.  Why?  Because they see no difference (and no, I didn't tell them who it was because I don't want them to start singling those people out when they didn't in the first place).

I love everyone in my life, regardless of color, race, sexual orientation, or sex.  Actually, I love them FOR their color, race, sexual orientation, and sex.  If it weren't for these, my life would be boring.  America would be boring.  My children are mixed race children.  My children are what America is about.  Yes, America, the Beautiful.

Thank you Coca Cola, for making us see that America is not exactly where I want it to be for my children, and that just this blog might change one person's perspective.  But also, thank you for making a commercial that portrays the beauty of difference which makes us all unique.  The one thing that we all have in common is that we are American.

Oh and thank you Brenda Wood, for using the platform that you have to express everything I believe is true.

Now, on to teach my girls about people I like to call "ignorant."  And teach them not to be like them.

It's begun...

I just had a talk with my girls about how they have been acting towards me lately.  They, of course, only act like this with me.  I remember my mother having the same talk with my brother and me.  I don't get why this happens.  I don't know how to change it.  But I get what my mom told us back in the day.  I'm sorry mom.  I know how it feels, and it's not fun.

So it begins with Cadyn having a constant attitude and thinking she is Austin's boss, and Austin growling, grunting or just plain throwing a fit whenever she doesn't get her way.  So I sit with them in their room before bed.  They start crying when I talked to them tonight about how they have been acting WITH JUST ME.  They don't do it with dad, they don't do it with Mimi and Pops, they don't do it with Aita and Aito, they don't do it at school...just me. Lucky me.  Don't get me wrong, I love that they behave with everyone else, but I would love to not have a screaming tantrum EVERY time I tell Austin it's time to go to bed.  It's not a surprise, it's gonna happen every day (bedtime, that is).  So they responded very well to my plea for better attitudes and better behaviors...it'll probably last a day. Very apologetic and wanting to be better.  I truly have good girls, they just act like fools sometimes.

Austin tells me (while conjuring up tears...though forced at first, it was truly heartbreaking): "I know I'm not the best girl in this house, but I want to be better.  I know I'm not the best girl in this house."  I started tearing up.  I told them that nobody in this house is perfect, Austin's not perfect, Cadyn's not perfect, I'm not perfect...Cadyn interrupts (crying), "Yes you are mom, you ARE perfect.  You are perfect to me."  Dammit, I can't keep it together.

I tell them that we are going to start limiting their T.V. because I feel like it's impacting their attitudes and they aren't learning anything from it.  I tell them about the amount of T.V. I watched when I was their age (umm, I couldn't think of anything other than on the weekends like T.G.I.Fridays, Saturday morning cartoons, and the occasional MTV Music Video Premier).  There is no T.V. tomorrow.  There will be less T.V. from here on out.  There will be more reading/math/chores..responsibilities.  I mean, I was reading book after book at Cadyn's age.  Sweet Valley Twins, Garfield, Christopher Pike and R.L. Stine, Charlotte's Web, Sideways Stories from Wayside School...to name a few.  I want this for my girls, and Cadyn said, "I know that you are just doing this because you love us and want the best for us.  I'm so sorry."

Things have got to change, and there's no better time than now.

The "E" word

So, many thought that my last post was weird.  I don't think it's weird to let people know what you want when you aren't going to be there to plan it.  So in that case, I made every one's life easier.  You're welcome.

Now, on to today. Or, yesterday.  Yesterday I began to...Exercise.  Yes, I said the "E" word.  You don't really hear it come out of my mouth very often, but I'm trying to change that.  Yes, I've done it before. Yes, I've quit before. Yes, I'm ready to look better. No, I'm not ready to pay hundreds of dollars for a program.  Sorry.  I know me.  Though, I don't want to quit this time, but unfortunately you know me and I know me.  I need some motivation.  Right now I've only got my body as motivation.  The couch  and bed are just SOOO much more inviting than straining my body and sweating. But I really don't want to look like I'm 35.  I want to look like I'm (at the most) 30.

Now, I know what most of you are saying:  "Deanna, you are so skinny, you don't need to exercise." "I wish I had your problem of not being able to gain weight." It's not about losing weight, it's about getting in shape. I am out of shape.  I am no longer flexible. I have no energy when I get home.  I am straight lazy.  

Well, I need to be held accountable.  I need the motivation.  I started yesterday with Jillian Michaels' 30 day Shred Level 1.  I found it on YouTube..for free! I connect it to my Apple TV and workout in my own home!  Nice. And free.

I went grocery shopping for healthy (healthier) foods.  Fish, kale, veggies (gross), fruits, yogurt, oats and flax seeds, veggie chips...yeah I typed that!  I made some Garlic Parmesan Kale chips and some Nutella Energy Bites (added peanut butter and took out coconut).  I've eaten yogurt and apples with peanut butter for dessert.  Becky Owen and I even read that if you eat a tablespoon of Almond Butter before going to bed, you'll wake up with more energy...I'll let you know tomorrow at 4:30 when I wake up to work out!

Garlic Parmesan Kale Chips

Before bedtime snack

My dessert tonight

Now, the hard part.  Putting it ALL out there.  I want to do this weekly to see if I notice results.  So here are my first pictures of my body today (second day of working out).  Wow, I'm not liking what I'm seeing.  Gotta get a move on!

My Dunlap-It dunlaps over my shorts! (worst angle)

Back (my best angle at this point)

I wanna get my belly back to something like this:

I CAN DO IT!!!

R.I.P.=Rejoicing in Party

This may be morbid to some, but to me, it's necessary to put this out there. What am I talking about?  I'm talking about my funeral.  And yes, I'm gonna plan this bitch way, way, WAY in advance and no (Fabian) you CANNOT unsubscribe.  First off because YOU need to be a part of it.  It's not going to be a quiet time.  There will be drinking, dancing, and reminiscing about the fun times.  But I need to put this out there because I won't be able to make sure all of this happens and I know that at least one person out there reading this, will be.  And I am trusting in you to make this the amazing party it truly needs to be.

First off, no solemn ceremony.  I know people say it all the time, but I mean it.  I want a celebration. I know people will cry because if you know me, you know I cry at everything.  When someone you love dies, you cry.  I get it.  But we need to have laughter.  I would love everyone who comes to my R.I.P. (Rejoicing in Party) to bring their favorite fun picture of me with a short description of what was happening.  I want there to be a wall where all these pictures are posted and where my girls can take it home with them to remember their mother and how she was loved and loved to have fun.

Second, to continue with the fun, there needs to be songs and dancing.  These songs will be compiled by people's suggestions.  Songs that remind them of me.  I will have a list of songs that I will want to be played and the reason I want them played.  The list will be compiled below.

Michael Jackson gloves for EVERYONE! If you have your own, bring it. If you don't have one, one will be provided for you.

Other than that, just a fun time.  As I said before, dancing, drinking, laughter, reminiscing...a good time.  Toasts are welcome, no eulogy.

Oh, and I'm thinking that I want to be cremated.  We'll figure out where I want to be sprinkled at later.  But just remember...happy memories only at my R.I.P.

PLAYLIST
1. Seasons of Love-Cast of Rent (yes, it's a slow song but that's how we measure our life) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1c3MARlJ0Q
2. Pu**y Control-Price (it's Chris and my song) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bvok-HrCd6Q (no video, just music)
3. Without You-David Guetta and Usher (it's my girls' song) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=doWIkO1GGVo
4. Party all the Time-Eddie Murphy http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S9pxgv6NTps
5. Michael Jackson music
6. Beastie Boys
7. Crash Into Me-Dave Matthews Band Cadyn, Austin and I always kiss our guardian angel Derek in the car when the song comes on.

I will continue to add to my playlist as I think of them.

#WenJenDeBecks #Nash2014

Yes...come Friday, I will be Shadow dancing and saluting the Red, White and Brown!  Yes, the Fab Four (#WenJenDeBecks) will be reuniting once again, and it will be too short of a trip.  Shadow-Wendy (Reese) Wyatt, Red-Rebecca (Roberts) Owen, White-Jenn (Reese) Walker, and the Brown-yours truly.

Beck got me a plane ticket for my birthday and we fly out on Friday morning to Nashville.  Jenn is already there for work and will meet up with us later that evening.  While Wendy works until 4, Big B is going to have the luxury of taking Beck and I to lunch and, of course, for some drinks.

Our plans for Friday are to just relax with a few beers, whether it's at Wyattville or at a local bar.  On Saturday, we go to Nashville.  Wendy hooked us up with a FREE hotel with her points so we don't have to cab it back home to Hendersonville on Saturday night.  I truly don't care what we do because we make EVERYTHING fun!  Plus, last time I was in Nashville, I was pregnant with Austin.

I don't know if I will blog each day, but I will definitely do it when I come back.  Until then, I leave you with some old pics of the 4 of us.  There will be many more. #Nash2014

Halloween 2008

10th anniversary of my 21st birthday

Reese Night before the Wedding

First girls' night after I had Cadyn

Sherlock's...Madonna "Oh father" night...Drive-thru night for Jenn

Nostalgia with my daughters

Yes, I know, I missed my blog post last night, but I was finishing up (and finally catching up) on Game of Thrones. No excuse, I know, but as I am watching new shows, I can't help but remember all of the shows that I watched as a kid, some of those which my girls are watching now on Nick at Nite (this is the time when you know you are old).

First off, this weekend, the girls and I watched The Neverending Story and The Goonies.  This was the 2nd time Cadyn watched The Neverending Story and immediately when it came on, she asked, "Is this the one where the horse dies in the quicksand?"  I chuckled and said, "Yes" and she started freaking out!  She and Austin actually watched the whole thing, loved Falcor and were relieved that Artax came back at the end.

Now, Goonies is a love of our family!  HEY, YOU, GUUUUUYS!  So much so, that Cadyn got Wildcat of the Week in class this week and put Goonies as her favorite movie.  I don't know how true this is, but the fact that she put it down means she loves it. WE love it.

Another favorite of theirs is Home Alone.  Good ol' Macauley Caulkin..nothing could go wrong!  :)

Let's talk about what the girls love to watch on T.V.  Their favorite: Full House.  Second favorite, Friends.  They will also put on Fresh Prince of Bel-Air from time to time!  It's great.  I love hearing Cadyn say (while doing Spelling homework), "DJ, where have I heard that before?  It sounds familiar." Austin replies, "DJ from Full House."

Of course, having me as their mom, we listen to Beastie Boys (have you seen Austin singing it on Facebook?  If not: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10152145547951057&l=9063837995708603756) and Michael Jackson.  They sing along with both.  Cadyn was singing Billie Jean today with me.  And we busted out with some Journey yesterday as well to where we heard Austin singing it around the house as she's playing with her dolls.

I love my music, my movies, my shows, and my memories.  I remember how my mom would "sing" in the car on the way to school and work.  She would turn up INXS-Never Tear Us Apart, and I would cover my ears because I hated the song (NOT NOW...I LOVE it now).  She would play Led Zeppelin-Black Dog and we would all sing-along.  Or singing "Hey there Little Red Riding Hood, you sure are looking good, you everything that a big bad wolf would want...Aaaaarooooooo."  My dad loved to play his drums on the steering wheel when listening to Latin music and then he would hold the steering wheel with just his thumbs to where his pinkies stuck out.  Even better, the Bon Jovi war with my brother (You give love-a cinnamon name...don't ask, because I have no clue).  The best though is listening to Johnny Mathis on Christmas morning.  It is now necessary!

I am sitting here wondering, which of these moments that I cherish so much with my daughters, will they remember and talk to their friends and family about.  Only time will tell.

Deanna Margarita Hernandez Perkins Fallon Timberlake

As I sit here typing this, I have planned for this coming week at school, cleaned up the house some more, put my kiddos to bed, and set my alarm.  Now it's my time.  I have chosen to watch the Best of Jimmy Fallon on NBC.  It is the best way to end my night.  I don't know if you know this, but I LOVE Justin Timberlake.  If you didn't know this, who are you and do you know me?

Picture of Perfection-Houston Dec. 5, 2013

What's even better is the mixture of Justin and Jimmy Fallon.  They bring out the absolute best of each other.  They just had their Saturday Night Live episode in December and now this special and their History of Raps are great!  If you don't know, now you know (take the time, you won't be disappointed):

And this is how I became Deanna Margarita Hernandez Perkins Fallon Timberlake.